Smartest Child Ever

See, one family is teaching them correctly. The others are voting for Donald Trump.

Vintage Star Wars Travel Posters

Steve Thomas is a person. A person who does arty type things. A person who does arty type things that involve both retro stylization and Star Wars. A hero, in short.

Check out the rest of the neato burrito things of awesome nature here.

More Superbowl Ad(s): Star Wars + Car

This one is less homo-erotic, more awesome. I want a Volkswagen now. NOW.

I'll wait.

Blasphemous?

You bet your knickers.

And it's funny as all degrees of satan's jockstrap.

Look at that 2 undergarment references in one post that had absolutely nothing to do with underwear.

Tuscan Raider Booty: Star Wars Pinups

So is it homoerotic to take predominately male characters and turn them into sexy girls? If so I'm pasting my face all over some random porn chick pics and spreading them about the interwebs.

Ohh boooyyyss.

Check out the rest of the awesome approximately here.

Slightly Unnecessary

Does having this much ink on one's body confuse said person when trying to determine what color they are? Can I get enough tattoos to be a black guy? Will it make my junk bigger? Hmmm.

Star Wars Invades Other...Things

Graphic designer Matthew Ranzetta has created a series of rather bad ass posters for random movies using applicable Star Wars imagery. I hate him. They look lovely. Enjoy. Here.

Someone Build *Me* An Ewok Village

This is a super neat treehouse. There it is, being a treehouse. Also being super neat.  It was apparently a New Zealand restaurant that is now used for private events and stuff (like a sweet "the Rebels won" party).

Simple, Awesome Star Wars Posters

Andy Helms has done a series of very similar but quite clever Star Wars posters for episodes 4, 5 and 6 of the franchise. I'm jealous-y, because I can't draw a gorramn thing in illustrator. Check out the others over here on Laughing Squid

The United States of Star Wars

For everyone who has ever pondered the corresponding Star Wars lore geographic location to their state, there is this lovely guide to show you. In the forefront of the news world: Georgia is Taris. Bastilla saved us from some racer thugs, or was it the other way around?

Regardless, check out the full list herehttp://wedgeantilles.tumblr.com/swusa.

I Want To Watch This Version:

Anachronisme
Uploaded by LesSingesHurlants. - Arts and animation videos.

It's not quite the same without hearing Mark Hamill's insane "NOOoOOOoOOOOoOOoOOO" (the lowercase o's denote lulls in the infinite sadness that Luke felt at the news, that and you know....Lucas's writing.

Need: Princess Leia Apron

Nothing says "I bake a mean orange cake" like looking down at Carrie Fisher's jugs while doing so. Am I right or am I right?*

* the correct answer is "yes Aaron, you are right" right as rain in Spain on a plain bagel

Dark....Light....Dark....Light

Aaron needs a GPS simply for this now. I never get lost, however, so it would be pointless I suppose. However Yoda's voice gets me hard. That alone could be worth it. ::looks up prices::

Improv Star Wars opening on the NY subway. Neat.

I did this in my bathroom once. I played Princess Leia of course, shampoo bottles were the Storm troopers and the toilet made a rather convincing Vader. I didn't videotape it for fear of Lucas being jealous.

Also Handy: Star Wars Weather Analysis

Have you ever went on vacation and said "Damn, it's just like Kamino in this bitch, always raining"?

No? Well, regardless you don't actually know the weather until you know how Obi-Wan would have said it. So go here and learn how to properly talk about all that cloud coverage. Unless you're Beru....then you're dead.

One more thanks to The Emily, provider of all good.

Star Wars Recruitment Posters

So there's a pretty randomly awesome series of recruitment posters for what I'm assuming is the Empire, although some of them seem to be looking for Victoria's Secret employees. Regardless, I found them amusing in my dorky way. Check them all out here.

Star Wars: The Burlesque Show

LA Weekly has several (several is french for 40) shots of a local Burlesque club who decided that they needed more virgin semen (for the ritual of course). So they thought to themselves, what would give us the most (virginal semen)? then they thought: Star Wars.  And there were Star Wars and the Lord saw that it was good...and stuff.

Check out tons of pics here.

Waste A Lot of Your Life Learning Why The Phantom Menace Sucked

So here is part one of SEVEN quite long videos in which a mentally challenged, er, monotone man explains why The Phantom Menace was terrible. It's rather funny if you are slightly to moderately (completely) dorky.

Sorry for my nerdfest as far as posts go, my inner Youngling is angry at me.

Need: Jawa Lawn Ornament

I don't have a lawn, but I do have a dream. It involves a small family of these living along side black people like they aren't secretly afraid. That and a truly everlasting gobstopper. 

Tee Hee: Star Wars Was Noisy

This happened to me at my aunts house once, except instead of a garbage chute I was in her bedroom. And instead of laser pistols, I was singing Whitney Houston wearing her lipstick.

I know, eerily similar.

Sorry for so many videos today, I'm too tired to look at pictures, I have to imagine them moving that way.