Speaking of Unecessary Princesses...Car Lashes

Problem one: these are eyelashes for your car.
Problem two: the only women who will buy these can't drive already
Problem three: Problem one + Problem two.

Math is fun!

True Story: Twilight In A Sentence

Decisions decisions. Personally, Beastiality although, it's really oddly smooth....appeals more here.

Reason 4563242 Stephanie Meyer Has To Be Stopped

See, when I was in high school these kids would have been, deservedly, beaten. Now they get news segments. I'm glad I'll be dead within this century so I won't see the inevitable Sparklepire related doom we're all headed for.

Blog World: Pale Is The New Tan

So there is a genius who decided to gather all of the orange people of the world and put them on display, so us, the pasties can bask in their radioactive glory. And upon gazing at the angelic face before, I know that I am an inferior being until I put on some plastic underwear and let someone at me with a paint gun. Thank you Guido Jesus.

Check out the site here.

We Are Officially in Music Hell: Grammys '10

The Black Eyed Peas (yes, the group in the photo above)have been nominated for both Record of the Year and Album of the Year. These things are getting even less prestigious than Nobels apparently. For a full list of the travesties, er...nominations, click here.

I'm Moving: Snuggies For Dogs

That's it. I'm going to Pakistan. I may die in some firefight, but I don't have to deal with this bullshit.

America Has Poor Taste Volume 3

Ladies and gentlemen, your number one movie of the week is: G-Force. G-Force. That's right, the guinea pig thing. I know that the Harry Potter movie was somewhat disappointing, but this? It's your own damn fault when we are watching adverts for G-Force 5.

0h n0! Txting Teen Falls Dwn Manhle

Somebody give that bitch a license and a phone. Let's see how many we can kill. Check out the video newscast covering it here

Silly Women: Twilight Tattoos

Reason #940853 I'm glad I have a penis. I got to skip out on all that crap. Also I suppose it's reason #523 I'm glad I'm over 12. Check out all the horrible goodness here

::Shudders:: Creepy Ass Sewer Worms

This footage is from the sewers underneath Raleigh, North Carolina (which explains a lot about that state). It apparently is a clump of hundreds of worms living together inside the pipeline. Now I'm going to have weird worm dreams, it's happened before. I assure you.

More (Possible) Buffy Blasphemy

Hollywood makes me want to crawl into a cave full of Albino dwarves. It seems that executives are eying Megan Fox (yes, that Transformers whore actress) to take over the role of Buffy Summers in the newly announced reboot of Joss Whedon's series. (just without the Whedon part). We can pray that either she gets mouth herpes or this just doesn't happen. One of the two. That sounds fair.

You Filthy Filthy 19th Century Whores

....and I thought people were kinky now. So apparently this is a two volume set on how to remove foreign objects from various body cavities published in 1880. The collection of medical...marvels(?) is up for auction on ebay here.

Now I know I know. I normally wouldn't post anything relating to the mythical monster known in daily conversation as a va-gi-na. ::shudders:: This was simply too much though.

Oh, and the box of pomade stuck....been there, done that. and the compass.