Seriously, I Need New Pants: Bioshock Infinite Gameplay

There's like dorkgasm all over my desk. I'm terribly embarrassed, so I'm not sure why I'm tell you lot.

But seriously you get to shoot birds. BIRDS. 40 years later down in Rapture you only get some wussy wasps or crap.

BIRDS.

Like Ca-Caw Ca-Caw.

BIRDS.

Tee-Hee. Kitty Plays Duck Hunt

I knew I sucked at this as a child (and the ghetto target version included on Wii Play now), but I wasn't aware that I was going to be outdone by a cat. Granted, they do have killer instincts not found in us Homosexual Indoorsus.

Final Fantasy XIV North American Trailer

Well well, it looks like the Fantasy that should have been over in the 80s so says itself is heading towards its second iteration in the MMO community. Let's watch and discuss.

I have nothing to say.

Hero: Violin Version of Super Mario Bros.

So this super Asian sits and plays the violin to video games. Sound effects and all. I wish I could play the violin. I wish I could also lounge about in a tux.

This is what I got so far:

"Do do do duh do do do....Do do do duh do do" ow, my lips hurt.

The Drunken Moogle: Get Intoxicated the Nintendo Way

The Drunken Moogle is a kind of nifty website that teaches you exactly how Zombies, Mario and Samus get their drink on. I absolutely have to buy everything required to make the T-Virus shot seen above. Mmmmm....Twizzlers.

They even have some more relatively unknown gems such as Triptocane from Heavy Rain that you can make. It pleases me, like an army of small men tasked to massage your feet on cue. I don't...actually know if that would please me or make me pee out of fright. I can take my chances.

Check out the site here.

Awesome: Pixels

Yes, I'm aware this is on like every website ever since the dawn of man, but with good reason. Patrick Jean put together this rather neato short involving videogames that even I don't remember all of (and I'm old). Watch, enjoy, quake in fear next time you play Tetris.

Fallout New Vegas Teaser

Aaron needs.

New Sia Video: You've Changed

I love her. I also love videogames and awkward looking people. This is a win/win/win situation. No doubt about it friends.

Mass Effect 2 Has One Of The Best Voice Casts Ever

It's made of sex. and voices. Mostly sex though.

in other news, the fucking video isn't working. Just know that cool people are in it. 

A New Item Pouch Oooo!

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Zelda is a prostitute. The Ocarina of Time never existed. If Nintendo weren't so embroiled in this vast conspiracy to veil the Princesses misbehavior we would have a properly titled videogame, such as The Legend of Zelda Cavernous Vagina of Herpetic Doom.

Yeah, Herpetic is now a word and Aaron Bond made it up. Your move Webster.

It's A Videogame Kind of Night

Yes, I just sat for the entire seven minutes of this video and I chuckled to myself thinking "ha". I'm just hardcore like that.

Video has a bit of naughty language in it, so don't go "Hey Christian Billy! Watch this here video about Mario!" and then have Christian Billy throw holy water all over your crotch.

Tee Hee: Videogame Character Facebook Status

College Humor has put together a pretty freaking hilarious string of videogame characters Facebook statuses (I mean, you did read the title of this post, yes?)

I find them amusing and I giggle, in a manly hairy toes kind of way.

Check them out here

Why The Hell Not? Japanese Arcade Game

It seems the entire point is to disrupt the dinner party? I disrupted a dinner party one time. Got a hotdog stuck in my...place.

If Videogames Were Realistic

Cracked, one of the best sites ever in the history of ever, has compiled a list of user-submitted 'if videogames were realistic' images.

Enjoy, and shit. Check them out here.

How Sad: First Person Shooter Disease

I actually have Warcraft wrist. It's either that or all the masturbation. Yeah. masturbation.

'The Beatles Rock Band' Trailer!

Video Games - E3 2009 - Video Game Trailers

I just wet myself. I even bought diapers in case this kind of thing happened. I forgot them. The game looks brilliant and we get a taste of all the wonderful goodness singing Beatles songs in your house can bring. Also, you can apparently have two singers at once, which is just hella neat. Perhaps as an expansion you'll get the Yoko screeching like a dying bird track pack.

'Star Wars: The Old Republic' Cinematic Trailer

Video Games - E3 2009 - Video Game Trailers

Because Bioware is proving on a regular basis that George Lucas should leave his grubby little fingers out of that galaxy from far away. That or he should get hit by a semi. A semi full of Ewoks.

E3 Begins! Dragon Age Origins Interview

Video Game - E3 2009 - PlayStation 3

I'm terribly sorry for you guys that read and aren't into videogames. The Electronic Entertainment Expo starts today and there is going to be near a week full of the latest video game news that I feel matters. I will definitely be sporting some other stuff in here though.

Dragon Age is Bioware's newest/oldest game that's coming out this fall. It's going to have to satiate me until The Old Republic comes out. Or until I get a life.

Must Have: Scribblenauts

Scribblenauts is an upcoming game for the DS that seems, simply, kick ass awesome. So let's say (as the picture above suggests) there's a star in a tree that you need. Let's also say that you feel that a ladder is the best way to get it. You write out ladder on the DS screen and poof there one appears. Check out the trailer here

New Bioshock 2 Gameplay Trailer

Gametrailers.com posted a new, exclusive gameplay trailer for my sure to be new favorite game ever: Bioshock 2. I'm such a dork. Anime chicks won't even hang out with me. I hope they choke on their Bento boxes.

Check the trailer here